7 Rules of Survival for Aspies
By Jessika Endsley
Hi. This is Dizzy. If I'm screaming, this is because I made video, I managed to go and the audio didn't really work. I think my duct tape on my webcam was covering up the mic. So, when I was in college a little over a year ago, in New York, I minored in Philosophy. So obviously I think about Philosophy. And I wrote down my seven rules of survival. There's seven of 'em because that's an obsessive number for me. If this is the first time you've watched any of my videos, I have Asperger's syndrome. So here are my seven rules and some explanation to go along with them.
Integrity. That's number one. That's the most important one. Always keep it. Don't fall for what makes no sense to you especially to please others. If everyone loves you and you hate yourself, you lose. Your integrity and my integrity could be different because our morals probably vary.
Use your weaknesses
Number two, use your weaknesses. You weren't expecting that were you? Not everything in your mind that is negative is an imbalance. We were created biologically to feel pain, to alert our logical mind of something important. In America today, everything is treated with medication. I take Neurontin. "If you're crazy and you know, it shake your meds.". Yeah, that's how America is. Just because you feel sad doesn't mean you have a chemical imbalance or depression. Just because you feel anxious doesn't mean you have an anxiety disorder. There could be legitimate reason you're anxious. Identify and act upon these things rather than going to the shrink. Possibly, it could help. Actually work on something. Eventually I'll be off of this entirely. I'm only on this to prevent the seizures from the other medicine I was on.
Use your strengths
Three, use your strengths. Master them to create your mask, the face you show the world. This keeps you safe, functional and does not compromise your integrity, which is number one. Everyone wears a mask, especially Neurotypicals. Everybody's a little faked, but if you use your strengths and you capitalize on them and that's primarily what you show, then you have a functioning mask. You have to identify what is a strength and practice. That doesn't mean that you can't let your guard down to anyone, such as a spouse or a very, very, very, very, very, very, very close friend. And because it's organic, it doesn't compromise your integrity to have that mask.
Be careful with your emotions
Four, be very careful of who and what you trust with your emotions. Self-explanatory.
Five, Health. Feeling bad and looking bad lead to poor judgement and pent up bad energy. This is true for me. I don't know if it's true for everyone, and I'm a wee bit of a hypocrite considering I have not eaten in two days. But if I feel sick, I don't think, "Well, I am not looking too great. Just too bad." And it compromises my thinking abilities because I'll be thinking about how I look bad. And this is even on days I'm entirely alone, which is a lot of days. I still try to look decent. I'm just like that. It's just a weird quirk. I don't know.
Six, stay educated on all things you find relevant to number one, which was integrity. Don't be ignorant. If politics is something that is involved in your integrity, you need to not be ignorant on the subject. You need to actually know what you're talking about when you talk about politics. Or if your religion is a big part of your integrity, be knowledgeable. Actually read the book you're preaching about. Okay? Science-y people. You need to stay up-to-date on which science you're involved in. If you're also an Aspie, then you probably have one or two main interests that you constantly stay up-to-date on.
Find ways to cope
Seven, cope through where you are in your mind and spirit. If you're an atheist spirit, doesn't have to mean anything. That's an intangible dot force. Okay? It can just mean where you are in your mind and how you function and think. It's your mood. Keep it elevated even in chaos. My entire life has been chaos. So by the age of 21, I've figured out how to keep things very cool in my mind, for the most part. The main problem I've had is suppressing too much when I need to let things out, so it doesn't lead to a meltdown every few months.
So it's good to have a happy place in your head. I can zone out, almost entirely, usually, at almost anytime I want. It's a feeling of de-realization, which is related to a way, in psychosis, but it's not... Unless it's mixed with other things, it doesn't exactly qualify as psychosis, but it very much helps me. It's a very comfortable place even when everything around you is horrible, falling apart, people are going bat crap crazy around you, people are leaving. Mean comments on your YouTube video, or anything else that's negative in your life that's out of your control, you can maintain a level of happiness. And like I said, do not compromise your integrity.
I'm not telling you that you have to follow my rules, any of them. I'm just telling them to you in case it can help anybody. If you have survival rules, especially as someone with Asperger's, if you have Asperger's, feel free to comment. And everybody else, feel free to comment also. So, that's all that I have to say on this subject. Thank you everybody. Have a good day.